utica avenue: Pressing the "PAUSE" button

This part of our trip is coming to an end, for us as a family, and for Ozayr's students as well. The Rome portion of the study abroad is an intensive drawing course, culminating in a hand-drawn map of Rome by the entire class. Now, these are architects and design students, so it's not just any map - the students are encouraged to add layers, perspectives, through their research and experiences here. Relevant areas can be bigger, more detailed, or interpretive; there can be commentary, even pop culture references. You can see a glimpse on the student blog: here, here and here. So, in Rome, when the students are not working on their maps, they are walking the city with Ozayr, drawing, drawing, drawing...

Drawing is something that Ozayr has always done in his personal life as well. He brings a new moleskine sketchbook with him whenever he travels, and tries to fill it with sketches and notes. Turns out that it is one of my favourite things that he has brought to our family as well, when 2 years ago we started bringing individual notebooks with us on our trips. It is something I wanted to share on the blog today as a way to look back on the last month here in Italy.

The moleskine sketchbooks Ozayr got us for our first trip

It has become a lot more than drawing actually, and I have been struggling to find a way to articulate that. In fact, I would say that any improvement in drawing skill for the girls has been an added bonus. This notebook becomes a container for so many memories of their trip. There are no "rules" about what they can put in there, or how it is used, except that they must write the date on each entry. The girls draw, sometimes in earnest, but also doodle, play tic-tac-toe, glue in ticket stubs, press flowers in it. They cut up and make collages from the flyers and brochures we pick up at places we visit. In Venice, they scooped up handfuls of confetti and glued that in too. Hafsa's heading reads "Confetti Sprinkled by Little Kids." Their notebook becomes a very special keepsake, of their own making - how great is that? A truly priceless gift (as I fully realized when Hafsa left hers in the Blue Mosque last year and we raced back to retrieve it).

But the real gift here is something I did not anticipate. It is even richer, and one of which I think the girls are unaware. When you say "wow, I am really enjoying this view/moment/experience. I'm going to stop here awhile," you are truly pausing.

When you stop to contemplate or analyze even the aesthetics of the experience at hand, you are choosing to be awake in a moment that could have passed by very quickly. You are taking the opportunity to reflect on what you are seeing and experiencing within the moment itself. It has become a defining and meaningful lens through which to see the "view" - the culture, the aesthetic, the details, the generalities... It is the single most important thing we do while traveling, in my mind.

It's different from taking a picture, which I think does the opposite - it removes you to certain degree from the moment at hand, as you contemplate more what you will want to see or remember later. You are actually placing yourself in a moment much further away from where you are in the present, by saying "what will I want to remember of this moment next year? Or five years from now?" I actually saw tourists today with their backs to the view, as they were trying to take selfies with their phones...

So we stop. Ozayr draws, the kids draw or doodle. You might ask what I am doing during these moments? The answer to that is that my notebook is lined - I mostly write. Many of the blog posts here were thought up or scribbled out during these quiet moments. When I'm not writing, I pause as well, and I watch my little family draw and I hand over the eraser, or find dry places for them to sit. I make sure that everyone is close by and I enjoy the view.

I relish in my gratitude.

I would say a year or two ago, I encouraged these stops for drawing for them, because I was trying to facilitate this experience for them. But now it has changed. The girls and I went to the Palazzo Altemps last week, and it was them who asked to stop and linger at various works of art. At one point I was sitting on a bench while Hafsa drew at my feet, and Maymuna stood in front of me, giving me a lecture on the mythology behind the statue's subject. I could not have enjoyed that afternoon more, thanks to them and this little tradition now so ingrained in our family culture.

Over the last month, I have accrued many, many photos of Ozayr and the girls sketching in various locales. I will include some of my favourites :-) Thank you Roma for the memories, and thank you Ozayr for bringing something so precious to our family.